You are sent to a place you've never seen before. You are to meet people you've never known. No idea what they would say. No clue how receptive they would be to what you have to say. Does the prospect fill you with fear? You think you would start stammering & sweat your guts out? (Have you read this?!)
If the strange place is replaced by home and the strangers by your friends how easy does your task become? The difference between the two situations shows how confident you are of yourself.
Confidence (noun):Freedom from doubt; belief in yourself and your abilities.
A feeling of trust
Confidence is something I lack. It is a hindrance. An obstacle that stops me from taking the leap of faith. Leap towards things that are the domain of above average people. It has caused enough introspection. I scrutinise lots of people who come through as confident people. A few are "achievers", CEOs, self-made men, celebrities. First impressions are always deceiving. You spend some time watching them and then comes a point of weakness that shatters up all their defenses and opens up their true self. It is how they handle such situations that makes them what they are.
Barack Obama comes through as a confident man. Speaks with gusto. He was taking the presidential oath and the guy narrating his words was a bit fast. Obama buckled and missed a few words. He knew a billion eyes were keenly watching him. That was the moment he was bare... he is human too.
You could call me a sadist, but I take delight when such things happen. They give me a sense of belief that everyone is no different from one another. Everybody has their inadequacies. They all know what it is. They build up all their defenses around it, not letting you anywhere close. It is this defense that gives them the confidence they possess. Then comes a moment that suddenly breaks up everything & makes them stand bare, ready to be scrutinised. To be messed around with. Once you know what the other person's weakness is you are never nervous around him. You know his secret. Which explains why you are always confident when you are with friends. You know them, they know you even better.
Now this knowledge gives me a bit of confidence. No one is above board. Nobody knows Everything. If I'm wary of some stranger or star-struck, all I need to do is be patient. Find his weak spot. I will find it eventually. I could mess around with it and even crumble his life. But i'll just give him an inkling that I'm aware that spot exists. And then there is nothing to hide. No nervousness. Isn't confidence eventually described just as a feeling anyway?
3 comments:
well, errors are human! and if you are gonna be on the look out for mistakes by the other person to shatter his defense, you'd obviously find it sooner or later, but in all this, what if you expose yours and someone else spots it!
Loved reading the post because I could relate to it. It is okay to be a little less confident at times. It's natural because we are Homo sapiens. There's this little line that separates superiority complex and inferiority complex. As long as a person stays on the line, he's safe. Well, there are times when I border on the superiority complex scale but that diminishes almost immediately.
Every person has virtues and vices of their own. No one's perfect! And, well, scrutinising people and noticing their mistakes isn't sadism! :)
@varun: I'm not talking of errors actually. Its a slight hitch in their composure that gives away the fact that even they are slightly unsure. I do give away mine by remaining quiet! The others just keep talking!
@rampantheart: I like the explanation of the fine line between inferiority and superiority complex! And what I'm really inquisitive about here is the reason why you choose to come back to the line from superiority.
And I said i was a sadist, because I take delight when some over-confident person is humbled!
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